The Perception of Lack of Integrity: 5 Ways to Build It

Paisley Bird
3 min readJan 22, 2024

The media today promotes the opposite of integrity, wouldn’t you agree? Clickbaits for celebrity infidelity, public figures’ mistakes exposed (granted, some need to be), leaks of intimacy online, etc.

Would you want that to happen to you?

There are also many cultural and ethical dilemmas that plague the world with people in power that take advantage.

But this article isn’t about the world, it’s about you.

What does integrity mean to you?

One definition of integrity is: the quality of being honest and having strong moral principles. It involves the consistency of one’s actions, values, methods, measures, and principles.

How can we implement that in our own lives?

  1. Trust and Transparency. If we strive to make our speech and actions honest, we will gain trust from others leading to meaningful relationships.
  2. Self Respect. If we aim to establish and enforce boundaries, we are teaching others how to treat us.
  3. Values. If we know our beliefs and values, we are better equipped to make decisions that are in alignment with how we want to live.
  4. Consistency. If we can keep our word and our words match our actions, there will be less turmoil between us and others.
  5. Role model. Find a role model that follows the same principles as you and ingest their wisdom, but do not follow blindly. In time, you can become a role model too.

Why do we want integrity?

If the above doesn’t sound appealing to you, then I ask you to look at your life. Are you happy? Choosing shortcuts by taking advantage of situations, others and ourselves will not produce long term success. Using others for a temporary high will not fill the void. Take the high route, it’s a longer journey with tough obstacles, but it contains permeance that a shortcut can never fulfill. Long term success looks like: meaningful relationships, fulfilling work, aligned in your purpose, not feeling a desire or necessity, etc

What simple things can I do right now?

  1. Often the lies we tell others are lies we tell ourselves. Lies are not always conscious.If you don’t like something, say it, don’t sweep it under the rug. If you want something, give yourself permission to try it.*
  2. The next time someone asks you a question, pause and think about it. Will you give an automatic answer or a thoughtful one?
  3. The next time you create an error, own it. Most of the time we judge ourselves harsher than others.
  4. Actively listen in the next conversation you have with someone. Repeat back in your own words what you hear. You’ll find out that your emotional generosity will be reciprocated because they feel validated.
  5. Humble yourself- there will always be someone ‘better,’ than you. However, that comparison thinking is self sabotaging behavior. Turn it around to admire what others have rather than covet it. You can have that too. Arrogance is a turn off, how will you connect with another person if you make them feel inferior?

In conclusion, integrity is an important aspect of being alive if you want to have a meaningful life; plus with practice, you’ll find yourself feeling more at ease. Being in integrity is not inherently difficult, you can start small and grow, and that is beautiful.

*I don’t support or endorse experimenting with harmful concepts.



Paisley Bird

Insight Coach that lives in the form of an Intuitive Empath, HSP, and Visual Storyteller.